We had all we needed but I was not content
Brenda tells her story...
Twenty years ago, we moved to a new house and life was very busy. My husband worked hard, our two sons went to senior school, and I worked full time. We had all we needed, but I was not content. I was looking for something, but I didn't know what.
I thought promotion at work would be the answer, but when I was promoted things got worse rather than better. I tried standing up for my rights as an individual, but that only made everyone at home unhappy, including me. On a few occasions I went to a Spiritualist church, but something inside told me that what was happening there was very wrong.
It was coming up to Christmas, and people from the local Congregational church came carol singing. The money I offered them was not accepted as they only wanted to give invitations to their carol service. The whole approach impressed me very much. I went to the carol service with my younger son. We enjoyed singing the carols and the people were very friendly. Some of my neighbours were there too.
A few weeks after Christmas I went to the church again. This time I realised that the man who was preaching was explaining things from the Bible. Many times in the past I had wondered whether the stories I had heard about Jesus Christ were true or not, so I thought if I kept coming to this church I would be able to find out more and judge for myself. Over the next few months I went more and more regularly.
I began to realise that what was written in the Bible was true. Although the Bible was written by many people over hundreds of years, it all fitted together. The Saviour had indeed been born to a vigin in Bethlehem - just as God had promised. I also learned that God was holy and wanted everyone to love him with all their heart and soul and mind.
I was becoming increasingly aware of the fact that the way I was living did not please God. I felt I was at a crossroads. I could either carry on as I was and never be truly happy, or I could go God's way and find the peace I longed for.
When I finally understood that Jesus died on the cross because of my selfishness and pride, I knew I wanted to become a Christian. He took upon himself the punishment I deserved so that I could be free from my sins. At this point, I asked God to forgive me for all the things I had ever done wrong and I asked for the Lord Jesus to come into my heart and help me to live in a way that would please God. There and then I knew the peace that I longed for, a peace with God.
Life was not immediately easier. The first thing I had to do was to apologise to my husband and to start thinking of my family more than of myself. But with God's help things improved dramatically.
As I look back, I can see that it was the Spirit of God who led me to that church and also opened my eyes to see the truth about the Lord Jesus Christ.
Life is not always easy, as I still struggle against my selfishness and pride, but now I have the Holy Spirit in my life to help me and guide me in every circumstance.
One of the first hymns I loved to sing after I became a Christian was:
Amazing grace! how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found;
Was blind, but now I see.